Tuesday, October 4, 2011

An experiment. It was a fun experiment but the results were confusing but true.



Have you ever heard of Grindr?  Of course you have.  It is a gay App for hooking up.  You know how hard it is to meet people out there and gays like me and my friends find every way to meet that perfect someone.

One of my friends created an experiment on Grindr.  He posted a photo (not his) and pretended that it was him.  The guy was perfect, of course. 

The premise of the experiment is to find out if people will really fall in love and be interested in a person regardless of how he looked.  We all know that gay men are the hardest to please when it comes to looks and even though they would always say that looks don't matter in love, it does matter a lot.

Story continues below.....




So, every time he would open his Grindr App, there would be about 50 messages from people who would like to chat. (Read: Hook Up)  He would talk to them.  Some would bore him to death and he will block the person or gently tell him that he's not his type.

This went on for about a week.  He met so many people (not physically obviously). 

But, then he met this one person who peaked his interest.  The person was also taken aback by my friend's personality and they hit it off pretty quickly. 










Then came the time when the other guy was requesting for a phone contact.  My friend got so confused on how he's going to tell this person (whom he had started to have a liking to) that he's not real.  I mean, real but not real because he used someone else's photo.






From what my friend told me, he started to have feelings for the guy as well because he was nice and absolutely honest with him.  He became afraid of admitting to him that his persona is not who the guy think it is.  But then again, he was afraid of continuing this conversation because the longer he prolongs the conversation, the more it is going to get serious.



One drunken night after going out to the clubs, my friend decided to man up and tell this mysterious guy that the person he's talking to is not the person on the picture.  That the connection was an experiment and that he has realized that what he was doing is wrong.  The mysterious guy was heart-broken and said that "he probably couldn't trust anyone anymore after this".

I felt for the guy.  I felt for my friend too because obviously, they connected.   He was also troubled by what happened and couldn't be more resentful.




The result of the experiment was that we can connect almost instantly with other people and even form feelings through conversations.  We can have chemistry when you discount the looks of a person.  But to get there, there has to be some physical attraction first.  Regardless of how much you connect online or on Facebook - if you are not physically attracted to each other, all emotions go out the door.




That's is why I am still single to this day.   I have never met the man who I am physically attracted to (or vice versa) and at the same time, connect with the person emotionally and physically.

Do you think that a person can connect anonymously online without knowing someone's physical looks, could have a connection that would eventually disregard how the other person looks like?   Let's say we connect and we really enjoyed each other in our conversations, that I would not care what and how you look like?   I doubt it.  For gay men?  Absolutely not.


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